








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 33 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 176 matches | ||
| Wingman | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




80 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1304 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,756 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 969 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1082 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1216 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 489 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $717,603 of utility $139 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 67 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | julian96 | 47% | 17 |
| #2 | JoakimVonAnka | 47% | 15 |
| #3 | Blixten | 42% | 124 |
| #4 | PiM PiM | 37% | 41 |
| #5 | Unniblue | 35% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Froyboi | 33% | 86 |
| #7 | leffe | 32% | 31 |
| #8 | Willi | 26% | 27 |
| #9 | jugge | 20% | 25 |
| #10 | röin | 13% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Froyboi | 54 | 0.0317 |
| #2 | Unniblue | 53 | 0.0453 |
| #3 | Blixten | 36 | 0.0148 |
| #4 | PiM PiM | 14 | 0.0180 |
| #5 | leffe | 12 | 0.0196 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Froyboi | 214 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #2 | Unniblue | 162 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #3 | Blixten | 107 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #4 | Willi | 79 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #5 | leffe | 70 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Willi | +2.83 | 79 | 36 |
| #2 | Froyboi | +2.29 | 66 | 40 |
| #3 | leffe | +1.36 | 74 | 30 |
| #4 | Unniblue | +0.69 | 74 | 25 |
| #5 | PiM PiM | +0.51 | 55 | 12 |





