








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 301 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Premier | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1186 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,255 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 902 | 28% |
| Smokes | 676 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 930 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 747 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $422,734 of utility $180 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 45 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Syskey | 89% | 9 |
| #2 | Rizean | 80% | 20 |
| #3 | PeppaPleb | 78% | 9 |
| #4 | ✪ Oklinussi | 75% | 12 |
| #5 | Briefbombe ins Vodafone HQ | 75% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Briefbombe ins Vodafone HQ | 75% | 12 |
| #6 | geimpft? | 75% | 20 |
| #7 | :^)IAMHITBOY | 58% | 12 |
| #8 | ⍟ PlebSter | 56% | 9 |
| #9 | fRESh | 38% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fRESh | 2 | 0.0060 |
| #2 | :^)IAMHITBOY | 1 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fRESh | 99 | 0.30 | 3 min |
| #2 | Rizean | 39 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #3 | ⍟ PlebSter | 37 | 0.22 | 1 min |
| #4 | Briefbombe ins Vodafone HQ | 35 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #5 | PeppaPleb | 31 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fRESh | +3.19 | 76 | 82 |
| #2 | Rizean | +3.17 | 89 | 65 |
| #3 | Briefbombe ins Vodafone HQ | +2.80 | 76 | 56 |
| #4 | :^)IAMHITBOY | +2.19 | 77 | 63 |
| #5 | mythoS | +1.97 | 65 | 58 |





