








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 232 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 206 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1333 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 405 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 77 | 19% |
| Smokes | 152 | 38% |
| HE Grenades | 75 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 101 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $59,014 of utility $9 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 373 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kalaaay | 57% | 30 |
| #2 | Frog Martel | 57% | 23 |
| #3 | Nastii | 44% | 36 |
| #4 | Nexurge | 43% | 76 |
| #5 | RiotStarter94 | 39% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | RiotStarter94 | 39% | 33 |
| #6 | twitch.tv/naassttii | 38% | 45 |
| #7 | Mr. Simp | 35% | 20 |
| #8 | Carlito2602 | 34% | 50 |
| #9 | xSeeLen | 29% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nexurge | 21 | 0.0138 |
| #2 | Carlito2602 | 8 | 0.0078 |
| #3 | xSeeLen | 8 | 0.0158 |
| #4 | Nastii | 5 | 0.0063 |
| #5 | twitch.tv/naassttii | 3 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nexurge | 188 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #2 | twitch.tv/naassttii | 85 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #3 | Frog Martel | 73 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #4 | Carlito2602 | 70 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | Nastii | 58 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nastii | +4.51 | 52 | 56 |
| #2 | Mr. Simp | +3.59 | 50 | 28 |
| #3 | twitch.tv/naassttii | +3.34 | 57 | 54 |
| #4 | Frog Martel | +3.21 | 59 | 54 |
| #5 | Kalaaay | +2.69 | 73 | 41 |





