








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 736 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 132 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 22 matches | ||
| Wingman | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2171 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,854 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1138 | 14% |
| Smokes | 1866 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1223 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 3627 | 46% |
Our logs show you have wasted $939,627 of utility $143 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 409 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Playing 1 Handed | 44% | 177 |
| #2 | Chet | 42% | 45 |
| #3 | =☢ nuke girl ☢= | 41% | 153 |
| #4 | Oskway | 41% | 79 |
| #5 | BIGGIE | 35% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Chet | 42% | 45 |
| #3 | =☢ nuke girl ☢= | 41% | 153 |
| #4 | Oskway | 41% | 79 |
| #5 | BIGGIE | 35% | 43 |
| #6 | fent fairy | 28% | 68 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | =☢ nuke girl ☢= | 43 | 0.0146 |
| #2 | Playing 1 Handed | 18 | 0.0051 |
| #3 | Oskway | 11 | 0.0071 |
| #4 | fent fairy | 11 | 0.0083 |
| #5 | Chet | 7 | 0.0076 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | =☢ nuke girl ☢= | 488 | 0.17 | 12 min |
| #2 | Playing 1 Handed | 432 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #3 | Oskway | 233 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #4 | Chet | 154 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #5 | BIGGIE | 89 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | =☢ nuke girl ☢= | +6.07 | 77 | 52 |
| #2 | Oskway | +4.62 | 74 | 55 |
| #3 | Chet | +0.96 | 61 | 60 |
| #4 | BIGGIE | +0.25 | 68 | 55 |
| #5 | =𖦹 Mirage Man 𖦹= | -2.03 | 16 | 38 |





