










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 138 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 161 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1758 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,626 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1361 | 38% |
| Smokes | 1069 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 995 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 201 | 6% |
Our logs show you have wasted $750,082 of utility $172 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 134 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | prettypunaniamanda | 82% | 17 |
| #2 | LabubuPapi | 60% | 92 |
| #3 | PDUB | 55% | 29 |
| #4 | Hezi | 53% | 30 |
| #5 | Sky | 53% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | TOP OOTER | 52% | 54 |
| #7 | ANCHOR | 51% | 35 |
| #8 | .Damn | 51% | 61 |
| #9 | XM1014 | 49% | 139 |
| #10 | .Dope | 49% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LabubuPapi | 15 | 0.0075 |
| #2 | XM1014 | 9 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | .Dope | 8 | 0.0103 |
| #4 | .Damn | 7 | 0.0056 |
| #5 | Hezi | 5 | 0.0079 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hezi | 102 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #2 | Sky | 92 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #3 | ANCHOR | 86 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #4 | XM1014 | 50 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #5 | LabubuPapi | 47 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hezi | +2.85 | 76 | 54 |
| #2 | .Damn | +2.49 | 61 | 42 |
| #3 | Sky | +1.59 | 52 | 56 |
| #4 | PDUB | +1.17 | 58 | 33 |
| #5 | XM1014 | +0.36 | 54 | 29 |





