








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 104 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 88 matches | ||
| Wingman | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1223 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,094 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 324 | 10% |
| Smokes | 1021 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 860 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 889 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $714,108 of utility $232 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 197 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | prutser. ❆︎ ︎Frosty ︎Flakes ❆ | 50% | 28 |
| #2 | Yuki | 45% | 20 |
| #3 | NEY | 44% | 81 |
| #4 | Boom | 44% | 88 |
| #5 | 2p| | 44% | 79 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Yuki | 45% | 20 |
| #3 | NEY | 44% | 81 |
| #4 | Boom | 44% | 88 |
| #5 | 2p| | 44% | 79 |
| #6 | gideonpenders | 25% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Boom | 4 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | Yuki | 1 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | gideonpenders | 1 | 0.0101 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 2p| | 202 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #2 | Boom | 59 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #3 | NEY | 32 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #4 | prutser. ❆︎ ︎Frosty ︎Flakes ❆ | 19 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #5 | Yuki | 16 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | prutser. ❆︎ ︎Frosty ︎Flakes ❆ | +1.87 | 67 | 34 |
| #2 | Yuki | +1.21 | 59 | 50 |
| #3 | Boom | -0.12 | 78 | 66 |
| #4 | NEY | -0.21 | 56 | 55 |
| #5 | 2p| | -0.30 | 55 | 57 |





