








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 19 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 37 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
828 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,386 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1866 | 43% |
| Smokes | 394 | 9% |
| HE Grenades | 1393 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 733 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $23,031 of utility $9 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | snett ejm | 48% | 23 |
| #2 | Turktornet | 37% | 101 |
| 32% | 50 | ||
| 31% | 32 | ||
| 29% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | snett ejm | 48% | 23 |
| #2 | Turktornet | 37% | 101 |
| 32% | 50 | ||
| 31% | 32 | ||
| 29% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| 20 | 0.0187 | ||
| #2 | Turktornet | 13 | 0.0065 |
| #3 | snett ejm | 7 | 0.0160 |
| 3 | 0.0046 | ||
| 2 | 0.0045 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 176 | 0.16 | 4 min | ||
| #2 | Turktornet | 116 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| 50 | 0.11 | 1 min | ||
| 35 | 0.05 | 1 min | ||
| #5 | snett ejm | 20 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Turktornet | +0.78 | 52 | 54 |
| -0.05 | 39 | 56 | ||
| #3 | FRUKTIG FITTA | -0.73 | 36 | 63 |
| -0.99 | 55 | 36 | ||
| -1.64 | 35 | 58 |





