








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 672 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 273 matches | ||
| Premier | 264 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 111 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 84 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 43 matches | ||
| Faceit | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




75 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9781 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,049 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6962 | 32% |
| Smokes | 3910 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 5150 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 6027 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,934,985 of utility $103 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1140 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | showmeyourtt's | 72% | 103 |
| #2 | 😵R₨⌶⌶ | 66% | 109 |
| #3 | howareyou | 61% | 57 |
| #4 | Spudz | 61% | 57 |
| #5 | .ePT Tayco | 61% | 111 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Mist Vi | 58% | 60 |
| #7 | v | 57% | 82 |
| #8 | kyleman1999 | 55% | 223 |
| #9 | Five-Seven | 54% | 192 |
| #10 | EdgeG | 53% | 526 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EdgeG | 25 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | kyleman1999 | 10 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | v | 9 | 0.0056 |
| #4 | Spudz | 9 | 0.0074 |
| #5 | .ePT Tayco | 8 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EdgeG | 1087 | 0.10 | 29 min |
| #2 | Five-Seven | 916 | 0.23 | 18 min |
| #3 | .ePT Tayco | 274 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #4 | howareyou | 264 | 0.22 | 6 min |
| #5 | 😵R₨⌶⌶ | 244 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 😵R₨⌶⌶ | +3.63 | 79 | 63 |
| #2 | .ePT Tayco | +2.41 | 83 | 65 |
| #3 | v | +2.19 | 89 | 65 |
| #4 | Spudz | +2.18 | 81 | 61 |
| #5 | showmeyourtt's | +2.16 | 87 | 48 |





