








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1029 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 508 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Faceit | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 91 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




33 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6049 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,685 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6570 | 27% |
| Smokes | 8345 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 3870 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 5900 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,663,891 of utility $136 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3394 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | staNNN | 80% | 41 |
| #2 | WaTeR | 79% | 43 |
| #3 | brokenpegs | 78% | 100 |
| #4 | j1 | 78% | 45 |
| #5 | Bruh. | 76% | 110 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | !SkelEtoR!07! | 10 | 0.0034 |
| #2 | WaTeR | 7 | 0.0079 |
| #3 | Bruh. | 6 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | Imperius | 5 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | HAZARD6868 | 5 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ⭕⃤ blood_thirsty | 778 | 0.30 | 21 min |
| #2 | brokenpegs | 652 | 0.33 | 16 min |
| #3 | Bruh. | 566 | 0.26 | 14 min |
| #4 | HAZARD6868 | 478 | 0.17 | 11 min |
| #5 | Imperius | 324 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hyPerTEXT <3 | +4.04 | 79 | 65 |
| #2 | Bruh. | +2.22 | 72 | 67 |
| #3 | Mad Dawg ^ | +2.10 | 67 | 47 |
| #4 | p1xLe | +1.85 | 73 | 68 |
| #5 | j1 | +1.28 | 80 | 61 |





