








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 514 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 24 matches | ||
| Premier | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1557 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,992 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2049 | 29% |
| Smokes | 486 | 7% |
| HE Grenades | 2307 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 2150 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $295,110 of utility $53 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 99 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zood | 61% | 44 |
| #2 | TheTiddler | 59% | 37 |
| #3 | Rigatoni | 59% | 22 |
| #4 | Skrrt | 58% | 152 |
| #5 | Habunda | 56% | 141 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skrrt | 9 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | Habunda | 5 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | zood | 5 | 0.0059 |
| #4 | Linguine | 4 | 0.0070 |
| #5 | I'm Car | 4 | 0.0138 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skrrt | 465 | 0.15 | 11 min |
| #2 | Habunda | 232 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #3 | x-acto | 118 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #4 | zood | 68 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | Rigatoni | 60 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skrrt | +3.03 | 46 | 42 |
| #2 | zood | +2.87 | 54 | 45 |
| #3 | x-acto | +1.21 | 25 | 54 |
| #4 | Habunda | +1.18 | 19 | 50 |
| #5 | Rigatoni | +0.74 | 42 | 62 |





