








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 919 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 303 matches | ||
| Faceit | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 56 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4655 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,904 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3545 | 36% |
| Smokes | 2144 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1792 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2423 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,678,951 of utility $201 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 411 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Hue! | 57% | 70 |
| #2 | fkmup | 53% | 171 |
| #3 | YUNG FLASHBANG | 52% | 264 |
| #4 | msc | 50% | 197 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Hue! | 57% | 70 |
| #2 | fkmup | 53% | 171 |
| #3 | YUNG FLASHBANG | 52% | 264 |
| #4 | msc | 50% | 197 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | YUNG FLASHBANG | 30 | 0.0054 |
| #2 | msc | 20 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | fkmup | 4 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | ✪ Hue! | 4 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | YUNG FLASHBANG | 2117 | 0.38 | 53 min |
| #2 | msc | 822 | 0.19 | 20 min |
| #3 | fkmup | 561 | 0.16 | 15 min |
| #4 | ✪ Hue! | 51 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 123 | +1.81 | 84 | 56 |
| #2 | msc | +0.59 | 73 | 60 |
| #3 | YUNG FLASHBANG | +0.02 | 54 | 70 |
| #4 | fkmup | -0.62 | 65 | 61 |
| #5 | ✪ Hue! | -1.17 | 88 | 42 |





