








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1897 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 253 matches | ||
| Faceit | 114 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Wingman | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




150 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6041 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,945 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6352 | 28% |
| Smokes | 5002 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 6385 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 5206 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,598,860 of utility $143 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1812 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vaist | 56% | 39 |
| #2 | fortnite7 | 55% | 144 |
| #3 | Chief Beef | 47% | 206 |
| #4 | CL1FF | 46% | 85 |
| #5 | Ancient Island Owner | 44% | 154 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chief Beef | 55 | 0.0135 |
| #2 | Ancient Island Owner | 48 | 0.0151 |
| #3 | fortnite7 | 27 | 0.0089 |
| #4 | CL1FF | 19 | 0.0107 |
| #5 | pirots 4 | 17 | 0.0256 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fortnite7 | 389 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| #2 | Chief Beef | 251 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #3 | Vaist | 250 | 0.32 | 7 min |
| #4 | TONNI7 | 211 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #5 | CL1FF | 200 | 0.11 | 4 min |





