








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2702 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 1047 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 114 matches | ||
| Faceit | 85 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 64 matches | ||
| Wingman | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 142 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




138 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
13887 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 68,097 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 14970 | 22% |
| Smokes | 17291 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 17919 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 17917 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,705,440 of utility $82 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3818 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AbsolutSenpai | 14 | 0.0066 |
| #2 | SassyAries | 9 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | ChernoBilly | 9 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | Nevadageist | 6 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | Pfarero | 6 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SassyAries | 822 | 0.17 | 20 min |
| #2 | ChernoBilly | 541 | 0.15 | 16 min |
| #3 | Nevadageist | 260 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #4 | jonnyP | 221 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #5 | AbsolutSenpai | 153 | 0.07 | 5 min |





