








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 79 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Vertigo | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
608 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 807 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 168 | 21% |
| Smokes | 319 | 40% |
| HE Grenades | 173 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 147 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $343,575 of utility $243 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Boetkir | 60% | 5 |
| #2 | ✭ T Y S O N | 57% | 7 |
| #3 | benko | 54% | 13 |
| #4 | Xannie | 46% | 72 |
| #5 | REIGN | 20% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Boetkir | 60% | 5 |
| #2 | ✭ T Y S O N | 57% | 7 |
| #3 | benko | 54% | 13 |
| #4 | Xannie | 46% | 72 |
| #5 | REIGN | 20% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xannie | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #2 | ✭ T Y S O N | 1 | 0.0074 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xannie | 88 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #2 | benko | 28 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #3 | REIGN | 21 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| #4 | Boetkir | 7 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #5 | ✭ T Y S O N | 4 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xannie | +3.39 | 70 | 58 |
| #2 | benko | +1.11 | 48 | 66 |
| #3 | Boetkir | +0.82 | 58 | 60 |
| #4 | Dante12 | +0.39 | 66 | 46 |
| #5 | REIGN | -0.71 | 61 | 73 |





