








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 689 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 188 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 23 matches | ||
| Wingman | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 17 matches | ||
| Faceit | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Renown | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5836 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,954 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3874 | 24% |
| Smokes | 5127 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 3992 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2961 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,374,115 of utility $182 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 367 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shaxe | 56% | 43 |
| #2 | alpfacka | 51% | 120 |
| #3 | .::twe3Zy | 46% | 56 |
| #4 | fuqqboi | 44% | 66 |
| #5 | UniqueUser | 43% | 124 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Isaak | 10 | 0.0070 |
| #2 | Krizzlybär | 7 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | alpfacka | 7 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | Geiler Daddler M_1_T_L | 7 | 0.0094 |
| #5 | UniqueUser | 6 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Isaak | 414 | 0.29 | 14 min |
| #2 | alpfacka | 207 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #3 | Krizzlybär | 186 | 0.03 | 5 min |
| #4 | ☭ Köter ☭ | 180 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #5 | UniqueUser | 117 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rhux | +4.72 | 89 | 71 |
| #2 | alpfacka | +3.22 | 83 | 53 |
| #3 | ☭ Köter ☭ | +3.05 | 59 | 68 |
| #4 | Geiler Daddler M_1_T_L | +2.29 | 68 | 59 |
| #5 | Shaxe | +2.00 | 76 | 52 |





