








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 25 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 192 matches | ||
| Faceit | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 36 matches | ||
| Wingman | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




145 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7072 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,683 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4360 | 23% |
| Smokes | 5099 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 4700 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 4524 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,186,370 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 675 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | emjaay | 64% | 66 |
| #5 | Choccy Milk | 62% | 253 |
| #6 | Vexed | でんせつてき | 59% | 27 |
| #7 | sheedy | 41% | 37 |
| #8 | rená | 36% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Remlina | 101 | 0.0159 |
| #2 | Choccy Milk | 41 | 0.0079 |
| #3 | rená | 15 | 0.0245 |
| #4 | sheedy | 9 | 0.0123 |
| #5 | remi | 8 | 0.0045 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zithic | +3.12 | 80 | 62 |
| #2 | Remlina | +2.25 | 73 | 45 |
| #3 | remi | +0.69 | 65 | 59 |
| #4 | Vexed | でんせつてき | +0.21 | 73 | 48 |
| #5 | emjaay | +0.20 | 76 | 43 |





