








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 503 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 104 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 100 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 30 matches | ||
| Faceit | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




53 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7530 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,804 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6106 | 34% |
| Smokes | 5842 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 2716 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 3140 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,332,816 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 102 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Veldarious | 67% | 46 |
| #2 | Joey NoScopes | 66% | 35 |
| #3 | Lilly | 64% | 64 |
| #4 | kitkat | 64% | 64 |
| #5 | Stylin' on Ya | 63% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Asalo | +4.92 | 74 | 72 |
| #2 | Joey NoScopes | +2.81 | 66 | 58 |
| #3 | Stylin' on Ya | +1.47 | 65 | 55 |
| #4 | Maxenevitable | +1.33 | 74 | 64 |
| #5 | Childish Sampino | +1.00 | 62 | 55 |





