








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 114 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 33 matches | ||
| Wingman | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2690 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,392 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1581 | 15% |
| Smokes | 4041 | 39% |
| HE Grenades | 1607 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 3163 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $464,267 of utility $48 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Asalo | 64% | 64 |
| #2 | Stylish | 61% | 38 |
| #3 | Stylin' on Ya | 55% | 259 |
| #4 | Veldarious | 53% | 276 |
| #5 | kitkat | 52% | 347 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Asalo | +8.40 | 80 | 71 |
| #2 | Stylin' on Ya | +5.56 | 66 | 56 |
| #3 | Stylish | +2.25 | 53 | 49 |
| #4 | Veldarious | +1.43 | 59 | 38 |
| #5 | Lilly | -0.53 | 26 | 44 |





