








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 300 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 58 matches | ||
| Premier | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1925 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,668 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1545 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1459 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1336 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1328 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $224,013 of utility $81 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 83 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | chelleos | 83% | 12 |
| #2 | Terryyy- | 71% | 7 |
| #3 | pain | 71% | 14 |
| #4 | leddy_counterstrike_gamer_07 | 63% | 8 |
| #5 | brookszy | 58% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | pain | 71% | 14 |
| #4 | leddy_counterstrike_gamer_07 | 63% | 8 |
| #5 | brookszy | 58% | 31 |
| #6 | ItsNotLaura | 56% | 32 |
| #7 | Lexa | 50% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ItsNotLaura | 6 | 0.0091 |
| #2 | brookszy | 3 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | pain | 1 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | chelleos | 1 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | brookszy | 148 | 0.21 | 4 min |
| #2 | chelleos | 51 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #3 | pain | 46 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #4 | Lexa | 24 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | Terryyy- | 19 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sliimey | +5.71 | 94 | 63 |
| #2 | pain | +4.34 | 89 | 58 |
| #3 | brookszy | +3.31 | 86 | 64 |
| #4 | Lexa | +1.90 | 92 | 65 |
| #5 | chelleos | +1.73 | 79 | 66 |





