








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 288 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 143 matches | ||
| Wingman | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2677 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,435 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1729 | 32% |
| Smokes | 1020 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 2122 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 564 | 10% |
Our logs show you have wasted $738,540 of utility $138 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 255 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Glider banditcamp.com | 55% | 56 |
| #2 | Vegan Cock | 48% | 60 |
| #3 | ⚡Herberto⚡ banditcamp.com | 47% | 64 |
| #4 | ⚡LilBoy⚡ | 47% | 163 |
| #5 | Skojaren | 45% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skojaren | +1.46 | 35 | 47 |
| #2 | ⚡Herberto⚡ banditcamp.com | +1.08 | 67 | 35 |
| #3 | ⚡BigBoy⚡Bandit.camp | +0.88 | 40 | 42 |
| #4 | Vegan Cock | -0.71 | 41 | 54 |
| #5 | ⚡LilBoy⚡ | -1.35 | 30 | 36 |





