








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 176 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 89 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Wingman | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




207 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1713 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,709 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4399 | 35% |
| Smokes | 3108 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2885 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2317 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $555,461 of utility $94 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 643 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | poggers bro 2 | 52% | 90 |
| #2 | Tommy Salami | 45% | 107 |
| #3 | The Milk Man (Bad Rats Fan) | 43% | 143 |
| #4 | Mr. Krabs and the Gang | 41% | 82 |
| #5 | snog airsoft | 29% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | poggers bro 2 | 52% | 90 |
| #2 | Tommy Salami | 45% | 107 |
| #3 | The Milk Man (Bad Rats Fan) | 43% | 143 |
| #4 | Mr. Krabs and the Gang | 41% | 82 |
| #5 | snog airsoft | 29% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | The Milk Man (Bad Rats Fan) | 108 | 0.0396 |
| #2 | Mr. Krabs and the Gang | 75 | 0.0479 |
| #3 | Tommy Salami | 21 | 0.0098 |
| #4 | poggers bro 2 | 21 | 0.0128 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | The Milk Man (Bad Rats Fan) | 290 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #2 | Tommy Salami | 262 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #3 | poggers bro 2 | 176 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #4 | Mr. Krabs and the Gang | 75 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | snog airsoft | 31 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | poggers bro 2 | +6.30 | 77 | 78 |
| #2 | Tommy Salami | +5.12 | 75 | 78 |
| #3 | The Milk Man (Bad Rats Fan) | -0.08 | 50 | 47 |
| #4 | snog airsoft | -0.18 | 47 | 59 |
| #5 | King of the Sky and the Water | -2.19 | 43 | 67 |





