








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 747 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 124 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 48 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1341 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,932 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 976 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1399 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1235 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1322 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $901,457 of utility $300 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 171 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Guigarcez | 62% | 21 |
| #2 | Mario™ | 61% | 49 |
| #3 | MatoWonderchild | 58% | 115 |
| #4 | zaka888 | 53% | 88 |
| #5 | Franky Seals | 53% | 91 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Mario™ | 61% | 49 |
| #3 | MatoWonderchild | 58% | 115 |
| #4 | zaka888 | 53% | 88 |
| #5 | Franky Seals | 53% | 91 |
| #6 | Pyro | 50% | 58 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Franky Seals | 4 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | zaka888 | 4 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | MatoWonderchild | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | Pyro | 3 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | Mario™ | 2 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MatoWonderchild | 291 | 0.12 | 7 min |
| #2 | Pyro | 143 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #3 | Franky Seals | 129 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #4 | Mario™ | 55 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | zaka888 | 49 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MatoWonderchild | +3.38 | 87 | 60 |
| #2 | soysauce | +0.96 | 75 | 67 |
| #3 | Mario™ | +0.65 | 76 | 53 |
| #4 | Guigarcez | -1.58 | 50 | 56 |
| #5 | Franky Seals | -1.73 | 59 | 53 |





