








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 205 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1699 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,651 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1698 | 37% |
| Smokes | 1068 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1031 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 854 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $404,379 of utility $112 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 80 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TOP DOGE | 51% | 61 |
| #2 | wtannerb | 48% | 94 |
| #3 | blimp grimpin | 47% | 19 |
| #4 | Certified Cat Girl uwu | 45% | 11 |
| #5 | Stampede | 44% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Stampede | 44% | 41 |
| #6 | Imagine My Wagons | 42% | 12 |
| #7 | Choice1952 | 42% | 36 |
| #8 | GunSlinger | 35% | 34 |
| #9 | quwen | 17% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Choice1952 | 4 | 0.0053 |
| #2 | wtannerb | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | blimp grimpin | 2 | 0.0053 |
| #4 | TOP DOGE | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | Imagine My Wagons | 1 | 0.0042 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wtannerb | 203 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #2 | TOP DOGE | 165 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #3 | Choice1952 | 123 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #4 | Stampede | 109 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #5 | Imagine My Wagons | 41 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | blimp grimpin | +3.90 | 79 | 64 |
| #2 | wtannerb | +3.45 | 82 | 55 |
| #3 | Stampede | +0.85 | 64 | 56 |
| #4 | Gwa Gwa | +0.30 | 73 | 57 |
| #5 | TOP DOGE | -0.05 | 62 | 74 |





