








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 80 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2403 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,714 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2118 | 32% |
| Smokes | 1605 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1158 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 1833 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $801,714 of utility $143 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eloise | 10 | 0.0063 |
| #2 | Waxi | 4 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | Colo à chier sur | 3 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | StarKoz | 3 | 0.0056 |
| #5 | -Chiico- | 2 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Waxi | 460 | 0.15 | 11 min |
| #2 | ✪ BroKeN 暁 | 160 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #3 | Colo à chier sur | 152 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #4 | KenPachi | 125 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| #5 | -Chiico- | 81 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | StarKoz | +4.32 | 76 | 50 |
| #2 | -Chiico- | +4.01 | 81 | 69 |
| #3 | Nobody ゼウス● | +3.01 | 92 | 57 |
| #4 | Waxi | +2.45 | 73 | 67 |
| #5 | KenPachi | +1.63 | 75 | 64 |





