








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 724 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 166 matches | ||
| Premier | 93 matches | ||
| Wingman | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




57 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5376 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,207 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5030 | 29% |
| Smokes | 4275 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 4061 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3841 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,179,564 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2400 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ok | 59% | 203 |
| #2 | Wassupmyboi | 58% | 36 |
| #3 | Rose | 58% | 33 |
| #4 | Sosa | 57% | 332 |
| #5 | Shottie | 52% | 154 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Sosa | 57% | 332 |
| #5 | Shottie | 52% | 154 |
| #6 | clem | 51% | 41 |
| #7 | hydroking | 49% | 67 |
| #8 | Spuuky | 48% | 124 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sosa | 57 | 0.0085 |
| #2 | ok | 19 | 0.0044 |
| #3 | Spuuky | 19 | 0.0076 |
| #4 | Shottie | 16 | 0.0049 |
| #5 | hydroking | 2 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sosa | 922 | 0.14 | 22 min |
| #2 | Shottie | 693 | 0.21 | 20 min |
| #3 | Spuuky | 530 | 0.21 | 11 min |
| #4 | ok | 359 | 0.08 | 9 min |
| #5 | hydroking | 221 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sosa | +2.98 | 89 | 55 |
| #2 | Milks | +2.18 | 72 | 62 |
| #3 | hydroking | -0.14 | 76 | 65 |
| #4 | clem | -0.15 | 72 | 42 |
| #5 | ok | -0.15 | 73 | 59 |





