








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 324 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
940 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,605 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 982 | 38% |
| Smokes | 664 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 738 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 221 | 8% |
Our logs show you have wasted $470,636 of utility $187 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 36 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kim | 7 | 0.0054 |
| #2 | Excel Inc. | 5 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | BirGie T7/11 | 1 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | Dajel | 1 | 0.0034 |
| #5 | Urtapotturin | 1 | 0.0058 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DumboTheHacker | 126 | 0.21 | 3 min |
| #2 | Excel Inc. | 118 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #3 | Kim | 47 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #4 | Dajel | 42 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #5 | OstaBolli | 34 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dajel | +6.41 | 75 | 66 |
| #2 | BirGie T7/11 | +4.67 | 68 | 63 |
| #3 | dintil | +4.41 | 57 | 49 |
| #4 | Urtapotturin | +2.09 | 60 | 52 |
| #5 | DumboTheHacker | +2.07 | 57 | 69 |





