








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 360 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 190 matches | ||
| Faceit | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 44 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2923 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,921 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2340 | 21% |
| Smokes | 2477 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 3297 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 2807 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,261,864 of utility $188 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 184 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sad :] | 71% | 52 |
| #2 | fsk | 69% | 64 |
| #3 | must4chex1- 惨い - | 62% | 182 |
| #4 | CACHi | 59% | 192 |
| #5 | 7071NH0 | 59% | 100 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | must4chex1- 惨い - | 62% | 182 |
| #4 | CACHi | 59% | 192 |
| #5 | 7071NH0 | 59% | 100 |
| #6 | KayfuNK | 56% | 129 |
| #7 | KuestioN | 47% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CACHi | 11 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | must4chex1- 惨い - | 9 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | KayfuNK | 9 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | 7071NH0 | 6 | 0.0029 |
| #5 | KuestioN | 4 | 0.0058 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KayfuNK | 608 | 0.22 | 14 min |
| #2 | CACHi | 604 | 0.15 | 15 min |
| #3 | must4chex1- 惨い - | 455 | 0.12 | 11 min |
| #4 | 7071NH0 | 310 | 0.15 | 9 min |
| #5 | fsk | 305 | 0.23 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fsk | +3.27 | 81 | 71 |
| #2 | 7071NH0 | +0.97 | 52 | 79 |
| #3 | must4chex1- 惨い - | +0.76 | 69 | 58 |
| #4 | JoySn0w | +0.61 | 74 | 67 |
| #5 | CACHi | +0.12 | 59 | 74 |





