








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 491 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 177 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 85 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 26 matches | ||
| Faceit | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




31 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3602 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,278 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2581 | 21% |
| Smokes | 2861 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 3363 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 3473 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,555,497 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 144 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ego | 55% | 112 |
| #2 | Emeryt Profesor Was | 52% | 79 |
| #3 | ewile | 51% | 388 |
| #4 | remo1312 | 51% | 53 |
| #5 | $hyemah4wB | 51% | 85 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ego | +3.57 | 90 | 61 |
| #2 | mihal | +3.43 | 63 | 72 |
| #3 | $hyemah4wB | +2.86 | 83 | 32 |
| #4 | ewile | +1.64 | 84 | 45 |
| #5 | Emeryt Profesor Was | +1.47 | 80 | 55 |





