








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 458 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 184 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1171 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,856 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3767 | 48% |
| Smokes | 2185 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 728 | 9% |
| Molotovs | 1176 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $625,885 of utility $132 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1002 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HANKpeeters | 58% | 26 |
| #2 | RGames | 50% | 107 |
| #3 | Bjitch24 | 47% | 34 |
| #4 | JeffTheAce | 47% | 225 |
| #5 | kyrillk | 45% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | JeffTheAce | 47% | 225 |
| #5 | kyrillk | 45% | 66 |
| #6 | Bread | 43% | 68 |
| #7 | Wan Itch | 40% | 20 |
| #8 | Luukookie | 37% | 54 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JeffTheAce | 8 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | Luukookie | 4 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | HANKpeeters | 3 | 0.0057 |
| #4 | RGames | 2 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JeffTheAce | 370 | 0.08 | 10 min |
| #2 | Luukookie | 71 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #3 | RGames | 70 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #4 | kyrillk | 62 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | HANKpeeters | 39 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JeffTheAce | +8.22 | 84 | 52 |
| #2 | HANKpeeters | +0.84 | 21 | 49 |
| #3 | kyrillk | -1.67 | 30 | 23 |
| #4 | RGames | -2.11 | 34 | 26 |
| #5 | Wan Itch | -2.13 | 39 | 27 |





