








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 118 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 18 matches | ||
| Premier | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 45 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1054 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,515 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 658 | 10% |
| Smokes | 2541 | 39% |
| HE Grenades | 1854 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1462 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $74,572 of utility $14 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 212 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | kyrillk | 47% | 45 |
| #7 | Wan Itch | 45% | 22 |
| #8 | Bjitch24 | 44% | 66 |
| #9 | RGames | 40% | 30 |
| #10 | Twenny One iwnl | 37% | 54 |





