








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 348 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 150 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 86 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




43 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4044 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,244 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4474 | 29% |
| Smokes | 5536 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 3231 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2003 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,486,262 of utility $160 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1146 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Teh | 55% | 76 |
| #2 | Pumpalicious | 53% | 128 |
| #3 | Woriez | 45% | 38 |
| #4 | Milnex | 44% | 338 |
| #5 | Ryza | 35% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Pumpalicious | 53% | 128 |
| #3 | Woriez | 45% | 38 |
| #4 | Milnex | 44% | 338 |
| #5 | Ryza | 35% | 34 |
| #6 | bellyaches | 35% | 173 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Milnex | 37 | 0.0055 |
| #2 | bellyaches | 16 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | Ryza | 4 | 0.0059 |
| #4 | Pumpalicious | 3 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | Teh | 2 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Milnex | 1689 | 0.25 | 50 min |
| #2 | bellyaches | 779 | 0.23 | 21 min |
| #3 | Pumpalicious | 699 | 0.27 | 15 min |
| #4 | Teh | 97 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | Woriez | 65 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pumpalicious | +3.07 | 75 | 57 |
| #2 | Teh | +2.00 | 84 | 55 |
| #3 | Milnex | +0.29 | 55 | 86 |
| #4 | Johannes | -0.44 | 48 | 64 |
| #5 | Ryza | -1.78 | 56 | 15 |





