








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1173 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 561 matches | ||
| Faceit | 123 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 93 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 90 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 88 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 85 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 35 matches | ||
| Wingman | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 56 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




83 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
12448 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 38,564 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6570 | 17% |
| Smokes | 9387 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 12452 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 10155 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $4,434,734 of utility $161 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 203 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Reiner mit Headset in Übergröße | 48% | 187 |
| #8 | ∙◦●DR.Lurkovic●◦∙ | 47% | 520 |
| #9 | ak3LaBvB | 47% | 156 |
| #10 | Ludi | 46% | 348 |
| #11 | C4rl0_ | 41% | 87 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ludi | 20 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | вяαтzεпвαявıε | 19 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | ∙◦●DR.Lurkovic●◦∙ | 18 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | Reiner mit Headset in Übergröße | 17 | 0.0044 |
| #5 | n i c i | 15 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☞ฬĒṜฬŌĿ₣☜ | 1066 | 0.16 | 27 min |
| #2 | Ludi | 960 | 0.14 | 21 min |
| #3 | вяαтzεпвαявıε | 927 | 0.07 | 26 min |
| #4 | n i c i | 645 | 0.11 | 21 min |
| #5 | ∙◦●DR.Lurkovic●◦∙ | 542 | 0.05 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mario | +2.81 | 81 | 45 |
| #2 | Reiner mit Headset in Übergröße | +1.98 | 71 | 66 |
| #3 | Maris | +1.90 | 61 | 63 |
| #4 | Meliodas | +0.62 | 70 | 53 |
| #5 | ∙◦●DR.Lurkovic●◦∙ | +0.49 | 76 | 36 |





