








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 127 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
750 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,949 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 513 | 17% |
| Smokes | 768 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 826 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 842 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $418,690 of utility $201 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 368 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ekku | 67% | 33 |
| #2 | syfilisko | 60% | 25 |
| #3 | harmi | 58% | 57 |
| #4 | emep =D | 55% | 40 |
| #5 | CoHE | 54% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | emep =D | 250 | 0.31 | 8 min |
| #2 | ekku | 145 | 0.22 | 4 min |
| #3 | syfilisko | 133 | 0.26 | 4 min |
| #4 | kelarotta | 125 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #5 | harmi | 101 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tomep | +7.19 | 91 | 66 |
| #2 | emep =D | +4.59 | 87 | 80 |
| #3 | ekku | +4.12 | 90 | 69 |
| #4 | syfilisko | +1.14 | 55 | 75 |
| #5 | ᴇʙʙᴀɴɪ | +0.62 | 78 | 53 |





