








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1416 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 112 matches | ||
| Faceit | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 46 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4549 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,977 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5939 | 31% |
| Smokes | 5172 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3912 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 3954 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $834,689 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 495 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tomep | 61% | 83 |
| #2 | ekku | 56% | 110 |
| #3 | kelarotta | 55% | 177 |
| #4 | kala | 55% | 40 |
| #5 | harmi | 54% | 165 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | syfilisko | 15 | 0.0091 |
| #2 | kelarotta | 8 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | nagex =) | 7 | 0.0052 |
| #4 | ekku | 5 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | CoHE | 5 | 0.0049 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kelarotta | 395 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| #2 | ekku | 320 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #3 | syfilisko | 288 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #4 | tomep | 269 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #5 | harmi | 224 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | emep =D | +4.50 | 86 | 80 |
| #2 | tomep | +3.31 | 86 | 74 |
| #3 | ekku | +1.61 | 87 | 62 |
| #4 | harmi | -0.59 | 64 | 54 |
| #5 | kelarotta | -0.61 | 74 | 46 |





