










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 135 matches | ||
| Faceit | 97 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3346 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,847 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3388 | 38% |
| Smokes | 1857 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1265 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 2337 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,273,744 of utility $216 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 339 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mJ | 74% | 19 |
| #2 | ThatFishyCombo | 66% | 50 |
| #3 | Tinus | 61% | 23 |
| #4 | Slieek | 53% | 17 |
| #5 | TPPH | 50% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Slieek | 53% | 17 |
| #5 | TPPH | 50% | 14 |
| #6 | Kappie | 50% | 22 |
| #7 | Ernie | 47% | 19 |
| #8 | stomp_de | 39% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ThatFishyCombo | 8 | 0.0074 |
| #2 | Tinus | 3 | 0.0062 |
| #3 | Ernie | 2 | 0.0053 |
| #4 | Kappie | 1 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | Slieek | 1 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ThatFishyCombo | 157 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #2 | stomp_de | 99 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #3 | Ernie | 59 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #4 | Kappie | 55 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | Tinus | 50 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mansnothot | +1.39 | 86 | 60 |
| #2 | ThatFishyCombo | +1.33 | 50 | 66 |
| #3 | TPPH | +1.03 | 70 | 65 |
| #4 | mJ | +0.29 | 44 | 61 |
| #5 | Kappie | -0.71 | 86 | 52 |





