








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 251 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 249 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3112 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,113 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 106 | 3% |
| Smokes | 1258 | 40% |
| HE Grenades | 979 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 770 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,107,610 of utility $161 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 213 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rona Destroyer | 78% | 18 |
| #2 | geek hard | 60% | 47 |
| #3 | VEETS5 | 56% | 64 |
| #4 | kim sexler feet | 55% | 77 |
| #5 | Jonah Lee | 49% | 45 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VEETS5 | 28 | 0.0213 |
| #2 | geek hard | 18 | 0.0195 |
| #3 | Jonah Lee | 14 | 0.0151 |
| #4 | keith scuba <3 | 13 | 0.0057 |
| #5 | i HIT LVL 200 WOWOW | 6 | 0.0048 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VEETS5 | 291 | 0.22 | 5 min |
| #2 | i HIT LVL 200 WOWOW | 239 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| #3 | geek hard | 170 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #4 | Jonah Lee | 161 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #5 | keith scuba <3 | 148 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jonah Lee | +4.83 | 71 | 55 |
| #2 | Remex | +4.19 | 76 | 56 |
| #3 | grama | +2.68 | 74 | 20 |
| #4 | Rona Destroyer | +0.77 | 65 | 54 |
| #5 | geek hard | +0.73 | 75 | 62 |





