








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 647 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 410 matches | ||
| Faceit | 38 matches | ||
| Wingman | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 84 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4412 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,267 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2957 | 19% |
| Smokes | 4024 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3567 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 4719 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,997,001 of utility $172 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 405 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Laposte TN | 59% | 71 |
| #2 | ZarKyo | 50% | 219 |
| #3 | Brice de Nice | 50% | 252 |
| #4 | Kerchak | 47% | 361 |
| #5 | LiXiUm | 47% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | ZarKyo | 50% | 219 |
| #3 | Brice de Nice | 50% | 252 |
| #4 | Kerchak | 47% | 361 |
| #5 | LiXiUm | 47% | 66 |
| #6 | Fast fucker (4s max) | 40% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Brice de Nice | 15 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | Kerchak | 14 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | LiXiUm | 10 | 0.0070 |
| #4 | Laposte TN | 7 | 0.0048 |
| #5 | Fast fucker (4s max) | 7 | 0.0109 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Brice de Nice | 1170 | 0.22 | 29 min |
| #2 | Kerchak | 985 | 0.13 | 21 min |
| #3 | ZarKyo | 602 | 0.13 | 17 min |
| #4 | Laposte TN | 125 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #5 | Fast fucker (4s max) | 68 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Brice de Nice | +2.02 | 54 | 73 |
| #2 | Laposte TN | +1.94 | 48 | 56 |
| #3 | Alecqss | +1.06 | 50 | 59 |
| #4 | ZarKyo | -0.32 | 33 | 59 |
| #5 | LiXiUm | -1.29 | 43 | 31 |





