








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 54 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 215 matches | ||
| Faceit | 50 matches | ||
| Wingman | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2856 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,243 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2885 | 26% |
| Smokes | 3572 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 2359 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2427 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $766,946 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 124 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mikkotar666 | 70% | 23 |
| #2 | Xix | 65% | 20 |
| #3 | Meggala | 65% | 37 |
| #4 | KipeaUkkeli | 65% | 62 |
| #5 | pAtOnKiJaLkAsHeNkOViTcH | 63% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sorsa | 2 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | KipeaUkkeli | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | Hullukukko | 1 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | Meggala | 1 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | Gammel Turja | 1 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Verner Rancca | 188 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #2 | Gammel Turja | 127 | 0.25 | 3 min |
| #3 | KipeaUkkeli | 121 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #4 | Kurry | 96 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | Hattutehdas Oy | 80 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pAtOnKiJaLkAsHeNkOViTcH | +3.76 | 56 | 61 |
| #2 | Verner Rancca | +2.88 | 63 | 73 |
| #3 | Meggala | +2.63 | 70 | 74 |
| #4 | Gangrene | +2.05 | 73 | 62 |
| #5 | убийца орков | +1.65 | 69 | 72 |





