








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 771 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 689 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8432 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 39,379 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12355 | 31% |
| Smokes | 10979 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 7903 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 8142 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,745,495 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 84 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FOSS | 51% | 464 |
| #2 | Flooodles | 51% | 476 |
| #3 | Warty | 50% | 216 |
| #4 | phenkis | 49% | 404 |
| #5 | Reeses258 | 49% | 645 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Warty | 50% | 216 |
| #4 | phenkis | 49% | 404 |
| #5 | Reeses258 | 49% | 645 |
| #6 | Kart | 49% | 539 |
| #7 | Snickle | 48% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FOSS | 27 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | Flooodles | 14 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | Reeses258 | 12 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | phenkis | 12 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | Snickle | 10 | 0.0096 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FOSS | 2097 | 0.21 | 65 min |
| #2 | Kart | 1461 | 0.13 | 36 min |
| #3 | Flooodles | 1263 | 0.12 | 40 min |
| #4 | phenkis | 1044 | 0.12 | 23 min |
| #5 | Reeses258 | 878 | 0.06 | 21 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shampoohbear | +3.49 | 71 | 79 |
| #2 | FOSS | +0.99 | 73 | 71 |
| #3 | Flooodles | +0.05 | 76 | 50 |
| #4 | Kart | -0.31 | 70 | 61 |
| #5 | Warty | -0.54 | 54 | 51 |





