








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 857 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 365 matches | ||
| Faceit | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 47 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6519 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,257 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3977 | 35% |
| Smokes | 2250 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 3278 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1752 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,002,101 of utility $180 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 732 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hazard * Finlayson | 59% | 41 |
| #2 | Aldes | 53% | 60 |
| #3 | Janari | 53% | 90 |
| #4 | Uneusaurus Rex | 53% | 40 |
| #5 | UKSU LFT | 51% | 57 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | ✪ Fiileew | 48% | 98 |
| #10 | master of rizz | 47% | 45 |
| #11 | volvoraggare | 43% | 44 |
| #12 | ♿ lauri ♿ | 42% | 31 |
| #13 | Köpykkä | 39% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | UKSU LFT | 24 | 0.0197 |
| #2 | Janari | 22 | 0.0115 |
| #3 | ✪ Fiileew | 20 | 0.0096 |
| #4 | Thomadson | 10 | 0.0042 |
| #5 | Eelis | 6 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Janari | 437 | 0.23 | 9 min |
| #2 | ✪ Fiileew | 400 | 0.19 | 11 min |
| #3 | Thomadson | 320 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #4 | Eelis | 238 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #5 | master of rizz | 166 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | volvoraggare | +1.91 | 54 | 59 |
| #2 | AQSU | +1.47 | 46 | 53 |
| #3 | ✪ Fiileew | +1.45 | 67 | 69 |
| #4 | Eeär | +1.40 | 63 | 59 |
| #5 | Hazard * Finlayson | +1.25 | 79 | 60 |





