








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 71 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 165 matches | ||
| Faceit | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4045 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,874 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3300 | 26% |
| Smokes | 3583 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2914 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 3077 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,501,401 of utility $179 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 692 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 奉献 | 61% | 61 |
| #2 | MartiTev | 56% | 61 |
| #3 | Dewbe | 55% | 208 |
| #4 | Keysrypt | 54% | 313 |
| #5 | Tempa | 53% | 97 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Keysrypt | 68 | 0.0107 |
| #2 | Tempa | 18 | 0.0088 |
| #3 | MartiTev | 13 | 0.0106 |
| #4 | Dewbe | 10 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | 奉献 | 5 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Keysrypt | 1137 | 0.18 | 30 min |
| #2 | Dewbe | 305 | 0.07 | 8 min |
| #3 | Tempa | 172 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #4 | MartiTev | 139 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #5 | 奉献 | 133 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 奉献 | +2.03 | 87 | 48 |
| #2 | MartiTev | +1.94 | 81 | 57 |
| #3 | Keysrypt | +1.54 | 67 | 63 |
| #4 | Thommo | +0.52 | 60 | 63 |
| #5 | Tempa | -0.20 | 64 | 56 |





