










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 125 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 70 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1527 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,983 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 458 | 23% |
| Smokes | 622 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 573 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 330 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $633,238 of utility $285 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 180 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Quandale Dingle | 63% | 8 |
| #2 | Atlas | 60% | 60 |
| #3 | C3K | 55% | 42 |
| #4 | stacy's dad-kun | 48% | 42 |
| #5 | Thda | 38% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Atlas | 195 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #2 | C3K | 44 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #3 | stacy's dad-kun | 36 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #4 | Thda | 36 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | Quandale Dingle | 20 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♥ Speedy | +2.87 | 85 | 45 |
| #2 | Atlas | +0.70 | 78 | 58 |
| #3 | C3K | -0.92 | 78 | 52 |
| #4 | Quandale Dingle | -1.40 | 66 | 60 |
| #5 | stacy's dad-kun | -1.80 | 84 | 42 |





