








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1207 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 218 matches | ||
| Premier | 141 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 141 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6477 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,979 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6474 | 31% |
| Smokes | 7386 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 3438 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 3681 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,714,007 of utility $178 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1308 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | keem | 50% | 127 |
| #5 | vuhx | 50% | 223 |
| #6 | Blaizi | 50% | 398 |
| #7 | stacy's dad-kun | 49% | 202 |
| #8 | Taliban Terry | 46% | 128 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vuhx | 31 | 0.0068 |
| #2 | Blaizi | 12 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | stacy's dad-kun | 12 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | i'm sorry. but | 6 | 0.0039 |
| #5 | keem | 4 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vuhx | 1240 | 0.27 | 37 min |
| #2 | Blaizi | 749 | 0.09 | 20 min |
| #3 | keem | 578 | 0.22 | 13 min |
| #4 | stacy's dad-kun | 245 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #5 | Thda | 173 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vuhx | +3.65 | 73 | 66 |
| #2 | i'm sorry. but | +2.26 | 78 | 53 |
| #3 | stacy's dad-kun | +1.11 | 86 | 48 |
| #4 | Quandale Dingle | +0.85 | 65 | 63 |
| #5 | keem | +0.05 | 60 | 58 |





