








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1404 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 435 matches | ||
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




30 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5679 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 26,903 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7246 | 27% |
| Smokes | 6737 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 6745 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 6175 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,460,513 of utility $111 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 841 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EliOs | 65% | 95 |
| #2 | vITUN vAGINANAAMA | 56% | 190 |
| #3 | スブラ | 56% | 73 |
| #4 | Lenin-setä | 55% | 55 |
| #5 | xJoKeSx | 53% | 344 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EliOs | +2.59 | 82 | 63 |
| #2 | xJoKeSx | +1.94 | 72 | 52 |
| #3 | スブラ | +1.20 | 86 | 55 |
| #4 | vITUN vAGINANAAMA | +1.16 | 69 | 62 |
| #5 | Lartzee | +0.98 | 69 | 71 |





