








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 713 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 179 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3783 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,661 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1604 | 17% |
| Smokes | 3253 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 2181 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2623 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,150,428 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 432 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | s0mple | 58% | 93 |
| #2 | blaq | 54% | 130 |
| #3 | |ATxxZ|JMN| | 50% | 24 |
| #4 | ツKarmaFlexツ | 46% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | s0mple | 58% | 93 |
| #2 | blaq | 54% | 130 |
| #3 | |ATxxZ|JMN| | 50% | 24 |
| #4 | ツKarmaFlexツ | 46% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | blaq | 51 | 0.0196 |
| #2 | s0mple | 32 | 0.0177 |
| #3 | ツKarmaFlexツ | 2 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | blaq | 438 | 0.17 | 9 min |
| #2 | ツKarmaFlexツ | 152 | 0.21 | 3 min |
| #3 | s0mple | 150 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #4 | |ATxxZ|JMN| | 57 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | blaq | +3.11 | 76 | 42 |
| #2 | G4U | +2.23 | 58 | 48 |
| #3 | |ATxxZ|JMN| | +0.75 | 68 | 54 |
| #4 | s0mple | -0.80 | 50 | 28 |
| #5 | ツKarmaFlexツ | -4.71 | 3 | 34 |





