








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 286 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 190 matches | ||
| Premier | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2820 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,887 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2000 | 20% |
| Smokes | 2410 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2658 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2819 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $898,102 of utility $147 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 134 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chouby | 54% | 28 |
| #2 | JF- | 53% | 47 |
| #3 | ✪ no | 44% | 25 |
| #4 | η9pe (: | 43% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chouby | 54% | 28 |
| #2 | JF- | 53% | 47 |
| #3 | ✪ no | 44% | 25 |
| #4 | η9pe (: | 43% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JF- | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JF- | 122 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #2 | η9pe (: | 84 | 0.27 | 2 min |
| #3 | ✪ no | 46 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #4 | Chouby | 23 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chouby | +0.75 | 79 | 49 |
| #2 | JF- | +0.66 | 93 | 55 |
| #3 | Ruby Da Cherry | +0.62 | 77 | 67 |
| #4 | η9pe (: | +0.26 | 77 | 71 |
| #5 | ✪ no | -1.93 | 72 | 53 |





