








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 284 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 134 matches | ||
| Faceit | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2774 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,161 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 975 | 23% |
| Smokes | 812 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 1100 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1274 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $854,601 of utility $137 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 218 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Raythe | 48% | 29 |
| #2 | c0hen | 47% | 17 |
| #3 | OogybeAr | 47% | 60 |
| #4 | Tydy3 | 42% | 48 |
| #5 | DreamzMeister | 38% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Raythe | 48% | 29 |
| #2 | c0hen | 47% | 17 |
| #3 | OogybeAr | 47% | 60 |
| #4 | Tydy3 | 42% | 48 |
| #5 | DreamzMeister | 38% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tydy3 | 4 | 0.0041 |
| #2 | DreamzMeister | 2 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | OogybeAr | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | Raythe | 1 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | OogybeAr | 319 | 0.28 | 10 min |
| #2 | Tydy3 | 137 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #3 | DreamzMeister | 131 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #4 | Raythe | 89 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #5 | c0hen | 28 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Splaylion | +1.83 | 73 | 42 |
| #2 | c0hen | +0.96 | 64 | 57 |
| #3 | DreamzMeister | -0.32 | 77 | 57 |
| #4 | Tydy3 | -0.87 | 51 | 62 |
| #5 | Raythe | -1.41 | 76 | 66 |





