








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 526 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 209 matches | ||
| Premier | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 54 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3874 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,653 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5806 | 28% |
| Smokes | 6314 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2653 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 5880 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,164,457 of utility $113 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3178 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FiSHY | 67% | 33 |
| #2 | Hiro | 59% | 66 |
| #3 | CAPE | 59% | 41 |
| #4 | FlowBacK | 55% | 29 |
| #5 | GeT_RiGhT | 51% | 140 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | GeT_RiGhT | 51% | 140 |
| #6 | Weeb ♡ | 50% | 34 |
| #7 | hvac | 50% | 431 |
| #8 | Corvette4 | 50% | 222 |
| #9 | Grandstanding Zywoo Corner User | 45% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GeT_RiGhT | 11 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | hvac | 8 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | Corvette4 | 6 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | Hiro | 6 | 0.0048 |
| #5 | Grandstanding Zywoo Corner User | 3 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GeT_RiGhT | 926 | 0.34 | 20 min |
| #2 | hvac | 455 | 0.05 | 9 min |
| #3 | Corvette4 | 380 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #4 | CAPE | 224 | 0.26 | 6 min |
| #5 | Grandstanding Zywoo Corner User | 138 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FiSHY | +5.99 | 90 | 60 |
| #2 | Corvette4 | +3.47 | 62 | 55 |
| #3 | Hiro | +1.90 | 71 | 41 |
| #4 | FlowBacK | +1.83 | 77 | 57 |
| #5 | GeT_RiGhT | +0.83 | 74 | 60 |





