








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 188 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Ancient | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1114 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,988 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1013 | 34% |
| Smokes | 734 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 575 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 666 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $645,507 of utility $210 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 149 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GeT_RiGhT | 59% | 34 |
| #2 | Corvette4 | 53% | 36 |
| #3 | Hiro | 50% | 16 |
| #4 | hvac | 46% | 59 |
| #5 | jake.pilot | 45% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Corvette4 | 53% | 36 |
| #3 | Hiro | 50% | 16 |
| #4 | hvac | 46% | 59 |
| #5 | jake.pilot | 45% | 65 |
| #6 | Weeb ♡ | 39% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hvac | 2 | 0.0016 |
| #2 | GeT_RiGhT | 2 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | Corvette4 | 1 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | Hiro | 1 | 0.0032 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GeT_RiGhT | 288 | 0.40 | 7 min |
| #2 | jake.pilot | 253 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #3 | Corvette4 | 72 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #4 | hvac | 49 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #5 | Weeb ♡ | 47 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Corvette4 | +4.96 | 65 | 61 |
| #2 | Hiro | +3.54 | 75 | 42 |
| #3 | GeT_RiGhT | +1.87 | 73 | 60 |
| #4 | jake.pilot | +1.22 | 49 | 63 |
| #5 | hvac | +0.09 | 81 | 32 |





