








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 410 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 126 matches | ||
| Faceit | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 48 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2128 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,060 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3580 | 27% |
| Smokes | 3345 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2967 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 3168 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $275,832 of utility $56 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 341 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | r3vs | 50% | 100 |
| #2 | Stillmatic | 49% | 37 |
| #3 | d00wN | 48% | 23 |
| #4 | spiff | 44% | 63 |
| #5 | GoNzo | 44% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | r3vs | 50% | 100 |
| #2 | Stillmatic | 49% | 37 |
| #3 | d00wN | 48% | 23 |
| #4 | spiff | 44% | 63 |
| #5 | GoNzo | 44% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GoNzo | 3 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | r3vs | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #3 | spiff | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | d00wN | 1 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | r3vs | 224 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #2 | spiff | 205 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #3 | GoNzo | 128 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #4 | Stillmatic | 111 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #5 | d00wN | 72 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | r3vs | +1.88 | 75 | 66 |
| #2 | qwad | +1.17 | 66 | 76 |
| #3 | Stillmatic | +0.47 | 79 | 67 |
| #4 | d00wN | -0.79 | 80 | 54 |
| #5 | spiff | -0.84 | 68 | 70 |





